I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
You know, be my cock's hype man.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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