Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
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