Plan B is the new Plan A
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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