It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Randomize