Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
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