I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
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