it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Randomize
