I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
