it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
