Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
