Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Randomize
