me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
