We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
