Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize