oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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