Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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