brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Randomize