nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
this just has baby written all over it
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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