i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen