I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?