I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
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I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.