But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.