I need a beard to bite.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?