...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore