Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
i barfeds in our rink
i think i have two assholes
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Betty ford says i'm here all night
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.