Texts From Last Night · Last Night in (718)

Last Night in New York (718)

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(718): View more from New York

we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.

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(718): we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love. http://tfl.nu/cgcu

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Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!

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(718): Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG! http://tfl.nu/4lok

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you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.

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(718): you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke. http://tfl.nu/vku6

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no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.

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(718): no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours. http://tfl.nu/ektb

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all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over

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(718): all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over http://tfl.nu/ocfj

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I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?

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Keg backpack and a Bike

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(315): I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED? (718): Keg backpack and a Bike http://tfl.nu/7afi

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I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"

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(718): I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!" http://tfl.nu/wp1u

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at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.

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(718): at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue. http://tfl.nu/efry

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He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.

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(718): He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter. http://tfl.nu/o453

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He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.

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(718): He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race. http://tfl.nu/hbzv

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If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.

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(718): If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs. http://tfl.nu/jfp1

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knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.

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(718): knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins. http://tfl.nu/4mi1

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what happened last night?

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u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style

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that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left

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(718): what happened last night? (917): u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style (718): that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left http://tfl.nu/i3a9

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He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.

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(718): He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head. http://tfl.nu/789t

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it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store

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(718): it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store http://tfl.nu/b87c

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Last Night in New York (718)

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