Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....