Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
25 Times Terrible Advice Was Given To A Teenager
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids