hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.