the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I CAN MOONWALK!
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.