bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
You're right, stupid question.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.