Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?