He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.