Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
21 Dirty Secrets From Bachelor/Bachelorette Parties That Have Destroyed Marriages
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
She's like a pop up book from hell.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work