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So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
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