Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
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The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
15 Porn Memes You’re Only Allowed To Laugh At If You’re Over 18
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen