It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
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I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
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She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.