Texts From Last Night · Last Night in (615)

Last Night in Tennessee (615)

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drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.

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(615): drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked. http://tfl.nu/g4y8

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Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.

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(615): Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka. http://tfl.nu/pwqr

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He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.

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(615): He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick. http://tfl.nu/ib3l

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of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits

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(615): of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits http://tfl.nu/a8zr

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you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.

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(615): you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this. http://tfl.nu/3l9v

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You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before

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(615): You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before http://tfl.nu/c77w

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He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low

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(615): He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low http://tfl.nu/d44y

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They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.

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(615): They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this. http://tfl.nu/rcac

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How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?

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(615): How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"? http://tfl.nu/jnls

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Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?

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(615): Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes? http://tfl.nu/jms8

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Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.

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(615): Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night. http://tfl.nu/na81

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The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.

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(615): The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face. http://tfl.nu/dqag

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His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.

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(615): His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary. http://tfl.nu/s0bc

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He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."

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(615): He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys." http://tfl.nu/9d5s

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just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.

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(615): just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here. http://tfl.nu/npdf

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Last Night in Tennessee (615)

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