She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple