I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Randomize
