is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize