I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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