So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
