i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
