i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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