If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
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