You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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