So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Randomize
