You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Randomize
