Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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